Pinky Pigs

My face went mental this week when I saw this:

@Angela_Barnesy: "This is my pal Jo Hoare's design project from school in 1991. M+S introduce Percy Pigs in 1995."

Jo Hoare 1991.
M&S 1995.

YOU DO THE MATH.

Now I've made false allegations against Fred Ferkel / Percy Pig before, and after the infamous "Tappsy Scandal" I am reluctant to open this particular Pandora's Pig Pen again. (All I'll say is, Jo Hoare, the Percy Pig empire is worth approx £2.2billion. M&S you better have a very good lawyer*.)

But either:

a) M&S are thieving b-stards who steal multi-million pound ideas from school children,
b) Jo Hoare has a functional time machine
OR c) the Percy Pig mould - like the works of Shakespeare and the likeness of Santa Claus - has gone into the public domain, and thus anyone can use it.** Even, say, cheap high street clothes retailers.

Yeah that's right, I said clothes retailers. Check these out, from popular UK high-street cardigan shop, Next:

MMMM SOMETIMES WHEN I AM BUYING A CARDIGAN I WANT TO EAT A SWEET SHAPED LIKE A PIG'S FACE ALSO.

Since when did Next start making sweets? I mean they make excellent cardigans, there's no argument there, none at all - but Pig Sweets? It's an odd extension to their range of socks and t-shirts with big numbers on. Anyway, they're definitely from the same mould as Percy / Ferkel - check it:

PINKY PIG

GOOD NEWS: JO HOARE YOU ARE ENTITLED TO 99% OF ALL PINKY PIG PROFITS***

BAD NEWS: Next's Pinky Pigs taste nothing like Percies. They're disgusting. Imagine eating some rubber that's been.... no, hang on, just imagine eating some rubber. That's it. They taste like rubber. And not even tasty rubber either. I'd imagine their cardigans actually taste nicer.

But this year I am hoping to win this:



so i am awarding them the full Gobble Monkey 7 out of 7. And if you don't like that, why don't you go and write a letter to OFCOM or something?****

Pinky Pigs, Next, £1
Gobble Monkey says 7 out of 7

thanks to @mullies for the sweets.
Check out more fake Percies here and here

*they probably do.
**it's definitely c) OK? Definitely.
***approx. £0.30p
****good luck with that.