Now and Later

Back when I used to eat bananas instead of Twixes, they had a thing in Sainsburys called "Four Now, Four Later" - four ripe, yellow bananas to eat straight away, and four green ones to last through the week.

GOOD IDEA. (I think Tescos had a similar rouse called "Eat Me, Keep Me" - not sure which is the better name, they both have strong merits)

Now a GENIUS has applied the same idea to sweets.

Look:

BUT MONSIEUR GOBBLE MONKEY, HOW CAN YOU APPLY THAT CONCEPT TO A SWEET WHICH CANNOT RIPEN LIKE A BANANA? I hear you cry.

Well, the answer is désolé ma petite bon-bons, je ne sais pas pourquoi. I would usually stuff an entire packet of sweets into my face in one sitting. But I think these sweets start off hard and then go softer the longer you leave them without eating, giving you the choice of a crunchy candy or a chewy one. However, I forgot I had them and didn't eat them for about 2 months so they were all soft.

WARNING! MAY CONTAIN TRACES OF EGG.

However, DON'T PANIC. I've done some intensive research to find out (I googled them) and this from the Now and Later Wikipedia page should clear everything up:

"Hard 'N Fruity Now and Soft 'N Chewy Later," the slogan found on each square's wrapping, replaces "Eat Some Now. Save Some for Later;" adding yet another dimension to the nominally prescribed temporal schematic of this confection by implying that each individual candy should be savored upon over a vaguely defined duration perennially bracketed between "now" (taken as the initial moment of contact between the candy and the mouth of the consumer) and "later" (the interval bound by a gradual softening of the candy through a sustained exposure to saliva and the culminating act of swallowing). Thus, in the new motto, the horizon of enjoyment remains suspended in a gulf between two temporal series- a "now and later" for each individual candy, and the modular "now and later" of the original motto- with each always deferring upon itself in a sustained promise of limitless futurity.

That is genuinely from Wikipedia. Surely it is written by some humorous wag out to destroy Now and Later with their devastating candy satire? You would have to be pretty dedicated to your mission to ridicule obscure sweets though. I reckon I am probably the only person ever to go on that page.

And what kind of loser spends hours attempting to satirise sweets no one has ever heard of anyway?*

Now and Later taste so intensely of artificial banana flavouring, it's like eating raw banana Nesquik with a spoon. DELICIOUS. Crunchy or not crunchy, I loved them.

Now and Later Banana, available from American Soda BUY THEM HERE
Gobble Monkey says 6 out of 7

*don't answer that question